I was the authority momentarily, so unhealthily defined. I’m such an entitled hypocrite and I always fear judgment. I remember how I acted as a kid. I’d utilize people to create pitiful narratives. Sometimes that’s how we would find places. Just walk around until we find them. “Do you ever feel like a phone call that’s been disconnected?” My sense of self has little to do in this play. Novelty glasses and french fries; I have become a superstar. “Fame is where you find it” and I found myself right here.
I anticipate experience and fun but my existential crisis is selfishly worrying about being forgotten. I want to be the kind of person who enjoys a museum, a show. I could have fun. Like, finding my personal version of an experience that’s just fun. Emotions are a feature of a product. Like sadness and fun are just a big blur so I enter the stage and it’s whatever. My diaphragm is sobbing, chasing the dream. I want to take off, take action, make a difference, like a mission in tandem with my life. I will be upbeat. Starting now!